Tommy Lawyer

2008-01-11T16:54:00.000-06:00

A company in Michigan is coming out with Major League Baseball-themed caskets.

What a frickin' sweet idea. Hell, I want one now.

Carroll lands the Sports Illustrated cover.

2007-12-18T12:21:00.000-06:00

Simply amazing. Link here.

2007-12-18T09:58:00.000-06:00

Carroll College wins its fifth NAIA football title in six years after defeating number one University of Sioux Falls 17-9. I watched the game at an alumni get-together down in Roseville. One heck of a muddy, messy game rife with turnovers, but good enough to get the job done. The win for Carroll snapped USF's 27-game winning streak after their national title last year. Carroll's 2005 title was their fourth in a row and this year's addition extends the dynasty.

What's most remarkable about this win is that there are only five players on the team remaining from their last championship team. This speaks to the program that they've built there and the abilities of Coach Van Diest.

Way to go, Saints.

2007-12-13T09:35:00.000-06:00

Some severe blog neglect here. Things have been incredibly busy lately. Some things that require comment:

The Dodgers have resisted the urge to sell off their future for Miguel Cabrera or anyone else on the trading block. Last week, they signed outfielder Andruw Jones from the Braves. As Mr. T-Mac pointed out in my absence, Jones didn't do too hot last year, batting a career worst .220 or so. Other than that, he's been a pretty consistent player though. I feel fairly confident that he'll bounce back. He better after getting a two-year $36 million contract. Either way, that leaves four men in the outfield. Juan Pierre, Andre Ethier and Matt Kemp are left in limbo. Pierre can at the very least be moved over to account for his weak arm. I hope that they either bench him or cut him since he can't hit (Pierre leads the league in bunts). Barring that, either Kemp or Ethier end up on the bench. If it comes to that, then there's the substantial possibility of a trade between LA and Minnesota for Santana. After the departure of Torii Hunter, Minnesota needs a young outfielder to replace him. Matt Kemp could fill that role. Of course, the Twins would demand other players as well--a Broxton, Billingsley, or Kershaw as well as perhaps a James Loney, but that remains to be seen.

Michael Vick in jail. This has all the makings of a real life version of The Longest Yard. I hope that the prison guards have some sort of prison league football team.

Saw some roller derby this weekend. That was pretty cool. Those Minnesota Rollergirls can brawl.

Led Zeppelin is finally on iTunes.

The George Mitchell Report on steroid use finally came out. Some intriguing names are in there that I might not otherwise have expected, like Eric Gagne and others. Intriguingly, the report recommends that Juan Pierre start using steroids. Not sure how they got away with that.

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia is one of the funniest shows in a long time. Season 3 is over, but Seasons 1 and 2 are on DVD in a package set. Worthwhile purchase.

This writers' strike is killing me. I can't stand many reality TV shows, except the ones that are making fun of reality TV like The Littlest Bachelor, the one making fun of The Apprentice, and My Big Fat Obnoxious Fiance. Those are comedy gold.

Anyway, that's all for now. I'll make sure to keep up from now on.

2007-11-12T17:34:00.000-06:00

I haven't posted in awhile. It's because I've been in a post-Torre malaise after hearing the news about 24. If you haven't heard, Season 7 of the show has been cancelled because of the writers' union strike. Unlike other shows where the network can just stretch their new episodes out with reruns, 24 runs in real time. FOX determined that it couldn't spend the money to promote the show for its January start unless it had more than roughly one-third of the episodes written. The show had already been delayed by a season plot-reset (it was originally to take place in Africa) and the California wildfires. Kiefer's prison sentence doesn't help matters much either. Thus, we now have to wait until September 2008 for the next worst day in Jack Bauer's life. What's unclear at this point is whether FOX will simply continue with the episodes it already shot or scrap them and come up with an entirely new plot line. The current one apparently involves Tony Almeida both alive and evil. Tony may want to be employed in some capacity betwee now and next summer, so that may not be possible. Guess we'll have to see.

Thanks, pinkos.

Since every other post currently on the front page of this blog is now about the Los Angeles Dodgers, I see no reason not to mention that Russell Martin received his first Gold Glove, that Don Mattingly will bear the number 8 instead of his usual 23 as a part of his new start with the Dodgers (in homage to Yogi Berra), and that the Dodgers are currently hot on Miguel Cabrera, A-Rod, and Johan Santana. All good signs that the McCourts are serious. Then again, they apparently just signed Chan Ho Park to a minor league deal. Got me.

The Dodgers are also now apparently eyeing Japanese free agent Kosuke Fukudome. Given his name, though, I think it would be much more appropriate if he were to play for the Twins.

That is all for now.

The picture I've been waiting for.

2007-11-05T16:18:00.001-06:00

Vin Scully formally introduces Joe Torre as Dodgers skipper along with Frank McCourt and Ned Colletti.

Don Mattingly and Larry Bowa have both also been officially hired as bench coach and hitting coach. From the Los Angeles Times:

Two coaches for Torre's staff have been hired: Don Mattingly and Larry Bowa, both of whom were coaches under Torre in New York. Mattingly has a son, Preston, who is in the Dodgers' minor league organization.

"Don Mattingly, I can't tell you how excited he is," Torre said. "We're just looking to go to work."

Torre, who was raised in Brooklyn and has managed the Yankees and now will manage the Dodgers, admitted when he was growing up, "I was a Giants fan. I want to apologize for that."

Things are finally looking up.

AAA-Rod?

2007-11-02T09:12:00.000-05:00

Hank Steinbrenner on Alex Rodriguez: "Does he want to go into the Hall of Fame as a Yankee, or a Toledo Mud Hen?"

The Toledo Mud Hens to Alex Rodriguez: "Go into the Hall of Fame as a Toledo Mud Hen."

SI.com:

A letter sent on Thursday to Rodriguez's agent, Scott Boras, offered a deal with a bonus if A-Rod leads the team to 10 consecutive International League titles.

But the offer stipulates that Rodriguez will have to compete for a spot with Toledo third basemen Mike Hessman, the league's most valuable player last season.

"Would your client be willing to play a different position?" the letter asked.

2007-11-01T17:21:00.000-05:00

Dodgers sign Joe Torre to a three-year deal worth $14.5 million.

Ned Colletti on the Torre deal.

2007-10-31T15:59:00.000-05:00

ESPN is reporting that the Dodgers are finally talking about Torre openly:

Los Angeles Dodgers general manager Ned Colletti sidestepped the Joe Torre question Tuesday, but on Wednesday he admitted to ESPN.com's Jayson Stark that there is "mutual interest" between the team and the former Yankees manager.

Okay. I like that part so far.

Colletti told Stark that the Dodgers and Torre are "in the early stages of getting to know each other."

And why shouldn't they be?

"I've watched stuff in the last 72 hours that I can't believe I'm watching," Colletti said.

Ouch. That part isn't good. I like what I've been hearing in the last 72 hours. I want more of it, in fact.

"I can tell you we do not have an agreement. I've seen more inaccuracy than I can ever remember."

More inaccuracy than you can ever remember? Don't play coy with me, Ned. By "inaccuracy," do you mean kinda like "Grady Little is our manager for 2008"? That kind of inaccuracy?

"I'm not going to get into where the negotiations are," Colletti said. "It's still early in the process in some ways." When asked if the parties were close, Colletti replied: "I don't categorize anything as close, far. It's either done or it's not done."

Translation: They're pretty close.

Get it done, Ned.

2007-10-30T18:18:00.000-05:00

From the Los Angeles Times about half an hour ago:

Sources said that the Dodgers and the former Yankees manager have agreed to the terms of his contract, and what remains to be done is to agree on issues about the coaching staff and his input on player personnel moves. Torre wants to choose his own coaches, among them Don Mattingly, and is negotiating the amount of money to be spent on them. The deal could be completed in the next day.

Torre AND Mattingly appear to be for real.

2007-10-30T09:48:00.000-05:00

Yesterday's speculation that Joe Torre would be coming to LA has turned into a report confirmed by two MLB officials speaking on condition of anonymity by the Westchester Journal News. Word on the street is that Don Mattingly, who was less than pleased to be passed over by the Yankees, is coming with. Mattingly's son was drafted by the Dodgers in 2006.

If true, this would be huge. Think of it--a native Brooklynite leaving New York to bring Dodger Blue back to glory. You can't write a better story. Besides, not only is the guy brilliant, he's exactly what the Dodgers need at this point: someone to quell the discord between the veterans and the youth on the Dodger roster.

Now this is still all off the record, but it has started a firestorm of press. Besides, the substantial evidence out there that the Dodgers gave Joe Girardi a firm offer before he signed with the Yankees tells me that McCourt is not in fact going to stick with Grady Little. If not Girardi, then Torre certainly makes the most sense.

Torre to take helm in LA?

2007-10-29T16:05:00.000-05:00

Please, Lord. I need this. New York Post:

October 29, 2007 -- If divorce proceedings between Grady Little and the Dodgers go the distance, as many expect, The Post has learned Joe Torre has been targeted as the manager to heal a fractured Los Angeles clubhouse.

According to two people with knowledge of the Dodgers' universe, the club and Little are talking about a buyout that would leave the manager's office in Chavez Ravine vacant for Torre to inherit.

Torre, who wants to manage again, is interested in talking to the Dodgers if the job becomes available.

Ask and you shall receive.

2007-10-19T11:28:00.000-05:00

So I make a brief complaint about how current stapler technology is on par with the carrier pigeon and a few days later a box shows up for me at work. Looks kinda like a pipe bomb, so I give it a good shake first. After the all clear, I opened it up.

Inside: A staple-free stapler.

The invoice inside indicated it was sent by a certain staffer at the Hague, so I assume this is the kind of weird contraption that they use to attach papers together in Europe.

Upside: No staples. Thus, you never have the problem of a staple snapping at bending point or crunching up part way through the stack of papers. You never have to yank an errant staple out with a staple puller or pull a broken piece of one out with your teeth.

Downside: The staple-free stapler only punchs a thin piece of the paper out, which you then fold back to hold the paper together. Consequently, it can't really hold them together. That, and you can only do four pages at a time.

Nonetheless, this thing is a pretty nifty gadget that now sits atop my computer tower, looking down on my American stapler. Thanks, Marie. ;o)

2007-10-16T08:14:00.000-05:00

Another unintentionally humorous ad from the Drudge Report:

2007-10-10T11:37:00.000-05:00

FREE JACK BAUER

Kiefer Sutherland gets 48 days in jail for DUI while on probation. Why 48 days?

"Kiefer made clear to us at the time of his arrest that his first concern was the welfare of those he worked with and that he intended to do whatever was necessary to prevent shutting down the show," it said in a statement.

"He told us that even if he had to sacrifice more time in custody in order to protect the show and the jobs of those who work with him, he would do so.

"From what occurred today, it is evident he is a man of his word."

2007-10-08T17:12:00.000-05:00

Somewhere a witty headline writer is quietly waiting for the day when Tony Romo breaks his ribs.

2007-10-08T17:11:00.000-05:00

Son of a bitch.......We really should have more advanced stapler technology at this point.

2007-10-08T11:00:00.000-05:00

It was fifty years ago today that Walter O'Malley and the Brooklyn Dodgers announced that they would leave Ebbets Field and move across the country to Los Angeles. The Los Angeles Times recalls the blackest day in Brooklyn history.

2007-10-01T17:49:00.000-05:00

It's not unusual to read about the occasional lawsuit being filed against God. It is unusual for God to respond:

A response to a legislator’s lawsuit from “God” asserts the court lacks jurisdiction to hear a Nebraska legislator’s lawsuit against him.

John Friend, clerk of the Douglas County District Court in Omaha, told the Associated Press the response was one of two filed on God’s behalf. State Sen. Ernie Chambers of Omaha sued God earlier this week to make the point that anyone can file a frivolous lawsuit.

"This one miraculously appeared on the counter,” Friend said. “It just all of a sudden was here—poof!"

The suit also argues that God is immune from earthly laws, he has not been served with the suit, and he should not be blamed for human suffering.

"I created man and woman with free will and next to the promise of immortal life, free will is my greatest gift to you," it read.

No contact information was on the filing, although it lists St. Michael the Archangel as a witness. Several local lawyers denied that they wrote the response, but they told Omaha’s Action 3 News they are available if God needs them.

Naturally, this whole situation warrants a few questions and observations:

Does God appear for such matters pro se?
Did He pay a motion fee, or does God get to proceed in forma pauperis?
Apparently God doesn't capitalize pronouns when referring to Himself. Definite sign of modesty.
Counsel for "God." How does one land that gig?
How do you serve God...with process? Would the local Catholic diocese constitute an in-state registered agent for purposes of service? I can imagine some testy Protestants having a problem with that, but come on...They're more like franchise operations. Just ask Benedict.
The article notes that God's second response listed a telephone number from a Corpus Christi, TX, law office. How freaky is that little fact? (1) If God is a Texan, then I am likely going to Hell. (2) If God is a lawyer, then I think we all are.

2007-09-27T10:38:00.000-05:00

In other news, I've been informed that the Chinese government is blocking access to this blog.

I'm flattered.

2007-09-27T10:21:00.000-05:00

And the Barry Bonds ball will go to Cooperstown with an asterisk branded on it. Link.

2007-09-25T10:08:00.000-05:00

"Tell me where the bomb is or I'll.......you're so pretty."

Kiefer Sutherland arrested for drunk driving.

2007-09-19T17:19:00.000-05:00

Marc Ecko, the fashion designer who bought Barry Bonds' 756th home run ball, is putting on a public vote to determine the ball's fate. From SI.com:

Ecko, 35, has set up a Web site that lets visitors vote on three options for the ball: give it to the National Baseball Hall of Fame, brand it with an asterisk before sending it to Cooperstown or blast it into space on a rocket ship.

...

Bonds said Ecko could have found a better way to spend three-quarters of a million dollars.
"He's stupid. He's an idiot," Bonds said. "He spent $750,000 on the ball and that's what he's doing with it? What he's doing is stupid."

Ecko did not directly respond to Bonds' comments Wednesday, but said in a statement he would make Bonds a custom T-shirt that says, "Marc Ecko paid $752,467 for my ball, and all I got was this 'stupid' T-shirt."'

See, this is why I love rich people. I'm actually a bit torn as to what I want done with the ball. The most appealing option at the outset is to blast the sucker into space. But then again, maybe we should save Bonds' shame for posterity by branding it with an asterisk and sending it to Cooperstown. You can vote at Vote756.com...Or you can do it right here. Of course, I'm leaving that first option off the table...

Sweet mercy.....Can it be true?

2007-09-19T16:51:00.000-05:00

The Jack Sack reports that Remote Access reports that TV Guide reports that Fox announced in a press release that TONY ALMEIDA WILL RETURN IN SEASON 7 OF 24.

To be updated...

2007-09-18T17:46:00.000-05:00

You ever see a headline and imagine something completely different?

'Dole recalls bagged salads due to E. coli'

2007-09-17T13:24:00.001-05:00

The new hot tourist destination in the Twin Cities? Larry Craig's restroom stall, says the BBC.

Re: RUBBER GAME

2007-09-13T17:58:00.000-05:00

We could use some more of this too:

RUBBER GAME.

2007-09-13T17:55:00.000-05:00

We need this. Do it to 'em, Dodgers.

Bush: 'I can't remember why we disbanded the Iraqi army'

2007-09-04T18:41:00.000-05:00

Yup. The single worst mistake of the war and possibly the precipitating factor in the rise of the insurgency, but Bush apparently has no idea why we did it:

"The policy was to keep the army intact. Didn't happen," he told the book's author, Robert Draper.

Asked how he had reacted then to the crucial decision by former Iraq administrator Paul Bremer to dissolve the army, the president said: "I can't remember, I'm sure I said, 'This is the policy, what happened?'"

Then he referred to Stephen Hadley, his national security advisor, saying: "Hadley's got the notes on all of this stuff."

By the way, Michigan...

2007-09-04T11:26:00.001-05:00

. . . Don't f&%k with I-AA.

Lucky you were messing around with those yokels from North Carolina...

The Great Debaters (cont'd)

2007-09-04T11:24:00.000-05:00

Second thought on that movie. It stars Denzel Washington, Forrest Whittaker, and some guy named Denzel Whittaker.

That has to be made up.

The Great Debaters

2007-09-04T10:23:00.000-05:00

Was just alerted to this by a friend. Movie coming out next year called The Great Debaters starring Denzel Washington. It's about a professor at a small Texas college in 1935 that forms a debate team and ultimately takes on Harvard in the national championship. Sounds like a mix of Hoosiers and Listen to Me.

I will be seeing this.

2007-09-04T08:29:00.000-05:00

Try and tell me this isn't Iran's version of "I'm the decider":

President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad has sought to justify his confidence the United States will not attack Iran, saying the proof comes from his mathematical skills as an engineer and faith in God, the press reported on Monday. ...

"In some discussions I told them 'I am an engineer and I am examining the issue. They do not dare wage war against us and I base this on a double proof'," he said in the speech on Sunday, reported by the reformist Etemad Melli and Kargozaran newspapers.

"I tell them: 'I am an engineer and I am a master in calculation and tabulation.

"I draw up tables. For hours, I write out different hypotheses. I reject, I reason. I reason with planning and I make a conclusion. They cannot make problems for Iran.'"

Wow.

2007-08-27T11:22:00.000-05:00

2007-08-21T16:53:00.001-05:00

Jose Offerman's lawyer says his client never hit anybody with a bat.

So I suppose in these pictures he's just holding the bat menacingly and not really doing anything with it. The pitcher apparently broke his own finger and the catcher punched himself in the head.

Good luck with that.

When Jose Offerman Attacks

2007-08-16T12:12:00.001-05:00

Former Great Falls Dodger great Jose Offerman went ape the other night. Offerman played for the LA Dodgers for a number of years before becoming a journeyman player, now a part of the independent Atlantic League.

After being hit with a fastball, Offerman charged the mound with his bat. He struck both the pitcher and the catcher, who tried to break up the fracas, in the head. He's been suspended indefinitely and is facing assault charges.

This may be a career killer (see sarcasm dripping). Too bad, really. He was my favorite Great Falls Dodger back when I was eight years old.

2007-08-14T17:00:00.000-05:00

The Dodgers have completely decimated themselves these last couple weeks. They went from a decent lead (for the NL West) of the division to fourth place, six and a half games out. The pitching rotation is broken with Schmidt and Wolf on the DL and Tomko and Hendrickson being, well, worthless. The few decent pitchers that are left haven't gotten anything in the way of run support. Meanwhile, Grady Little has done his best to make a comeback improbable. Dodger Blues put it best in their "Asshole of the Moment" feature:

8.13.07 - Grady Little
Andre Ethier is the only Dodger hitting worth a shit, and where does Grady have him in the lineup? Eighth—so the opposition can pitch around him. It's no different than buying a rose bush, putting it under the sink, and then wondering why the leaves are turning brown. Idiot.

They do this to me every year. I still blame the Braves.

Kim Jong Il shows off sweet new shades, jammies.

2007-08-10T13:24:00.000-05:00

2007-08-08T08:56:00.000-05:00

2007-08-07T08:41:00.000-05:00

Few things are funnier than BBC articles trying to explain what's going on in American sports. See highlighted caption:

I love English understatement. Article here. And if you really want a good gut laugh, check out the BBC's "simple guide to the basics of American football."

An excerpt:

Downs are the most fundamental, and confusing, part of the NFL rulebook.

The attacking team, or offence, needs to move the ball forward in chunks of at least 10 yards, which is why the pitch has yardage markings.

They have four chances, or downs, to gain those 10 yards.

When the ball has advanced that far another first down is earned, with four more chances to go a further 10 yards.

If the offensive team fails to move 10 yards within four downs, possession is surrendered, although the ball is usually kicked, or punted, to the defending team on fourth down.

While most scoring comes from near the defending team's end zone, a touchdown can be scored from anywhere on the field, and on any down.

2007-08-03T13:27:00.000-05:00

First KG, now this.

2007-08-02T12:22:00.000-05:00

Just so everyone knows, Lea and I are both perfectly fine and were in our apartment at the time of the collapse. All of our friends and coworkers that we've spoken to thus far were away from the bridge as well. It is a bit chilling, though, to think how often we've crossed the 35W bridge over the river.....

On a lighter note, tonight the Los Angeles Dodgers are holding a steroid awareness clinic for kids prior to their game against the San Francisco Giants. I'm sure that has nothing to do with Barry Bonds being on the verge of tying the homerun record.

This guy looks really surprised to be a Khmer Rouge leader.

2007-07-31T14:44:00.000-05:00

Almost like they snuck up on him to take his mug shot.

See 'First Khmer Rouge leader charged' at the BBC.

2007-07-31T02:40:00.000-05:00

The AP reports that everyone passed away yesterday.

Michelangelo Antonioni
Ingmar Bergman
Tom Snyder
Bill Walsh

So who exactly is Walter Mead?

2007-07-30T17:23:00.001-05:00

If you were in policy debate at any time in your life, there's a good chance you know the short string of words that have made him famous amongst the forensics nerdery known by all as "the Mead card":

But what if it can't? What if the global economy stagnates -- or even shrinks? In that case, we will face a new period of international conflict: South against North, rich against poor. Russia, China, India -- these countries with their billions of people and their nuclear weapons will pose a much greater danger to the world than Germany and Japan did in the 30s.
Mead, New Perspectives Quarterly, Summer 1992.

No econ DA impact is complete without Walter Russell Mead. Didn't know this until I looked him up after a conversation with my old debate partner Joey, but Mead is actually a respected senior fellow at the Council on Foreign Relations and a foreign policy scholar in the tradition of Joseph Nye. Yet amongst young intellectuals, he will always be remembered as the person who could put global nuclear holocaust together with economic decline in the fewest number of words possible.

"The way to deprive them of their ability to recruit is to attack the message. If you take Islam out of the message all that is left is criminality."

2007-07-27T07:14:00.000-05:00

Was alerted to this on a Guardian board. This treatise could become a very big deal in the coming months when it is published.

Sayid Imam al-Sharif is a founding member of Islamic Jihad in Egypt. Long ago he authored Foundations of Preparation for Holy War, the so-called "Jihadist's bible." He has long been a comrade of Ayman al-Zawahiri and has been serving a life sentence in Egypt since his capture in Yemen.

Now he has just finished a document aimed at undermining the theological basis for violent jihad that is already causing ripples amongst Islamists. Several Arabic newspapers are jockeying for the rights to publishing the work. There are no guarantees, of course, but a condemnation of violence from such a person could finally spark a much needed dialogue amongst Muslims as to the future of their religion.

The Guardian has the scoop here.

2007-07-26T10:28:00.000-05:00

Something I always suspected: the Grim Reaper is a cat. Just another reason why I don't care for felines.

'He only saved a billion people'

2007-07-26T08:25:00.000-05:00

Jonathan Alter questions why Norman Borlaug's Congressional Gold Medal ceremony went overlooked by the media this last week. Borlaug is an agricultural scientist and University of Minnesota grad credited with jumpstarting the Green Revolution by creating agricultural techniques that doubled crop yields in many third world nations. This week he became only the fifth person to be awarded the Nobel Peace Prize, the Presidential Medal of Freedom and the Congressional Gold Medal.

Article here.

(He's also apparently a former Big Ten wrestler and member of the National Wrestling Hall of Fame. Doubt Mother Teresa and Nelson Mandela can say that.)

Sheer unintentional hilarity

2007-07-26T07:35:00.000-05:00

Advertisement from the Drudge Report:

2007-07-24T13:28:00.000-05:00

Leave it to ESPN to hold a college basketball-style popularity contest that pits Peyton Manning against Amanda Beard. Really getting sick of this interrupting my morning sports fix.

2007-07-24T08:19:00.000-05:00

That thing is frickin' sweet. I promptly purchased a good war game (Medal of Honor - Vanguard) and we got to work on it last night. Pretty pimp setup although it takes some getting used to. The first few times we tried invading Sicily, we'd end up with our guns pointed straight up in the air, unable to do so much as walk. You have to get accustomed to keeping the control stick and the nunchuk balanced. Always a little ridiculous when you throw a grenade straight up in the air and then watch it land at your feet.

Anyway, highly recommend it. This is going to be good for keeping me busy until 24 and Lost start up again.

2007-07-23T15:41:00.000-05:00

My wife just bought a Wii.

Also, my wife kicks ass. Details coming.

2007-07-19T08:48:00.000-05:00

So New York has been piping steam around the city for the last century? And they wrapped all of the pipes in asbestos so that if one explodes, it'll rain carcinogens? You know, might be safer just to heat yourselves some water. Just sayin'...

Cleaning out the camera again.

2007-07-10T21:10:00.000-05:00

Found my camera over the weekend which means, once again, it's time to clean the sucker out:

My little sister Kendra graduated from Great Falls High School in June as valedictorian of her class. She went to that high school on the other side of the river, though, so that's the equivalent of about a 3.2 at CMR. Kidding aside, she's an incredibly bright young woman and I couldn't be more proud of her. She'll be attending the University of Montana in the fall.

But speaking of the Great Falls High Bison, have you ever heard of another high school that skins its own mascot and hangs it on the wall of its fieldhouse? Especially with "Pride and Tradition" scripted beneath them. I know we didn't have any dead Rustlers hanging from the rafters at C.M. Russell. Am I the only one who finds this odd?

Odd as that other high school might have been, as I've mentioned on here before, my grandfather Bob Cislo was a die hard Great Falls High fan--without a doubt the biggest fan the school has ever had. He attended every home basketball game and football game, health permitting. He even used to drive to away games when I was younger. And on occasion, he would be the only person in the stands watching a Lady Bison softball game during a blizzard, even though no one in our family does now or ever has played softball. After he passed away about a year and a half ago, Great Falls High honored him by placing a plaque on his seat, informing posterity that:

After Kendra's graduation, we took a family trip out to Holter Lake on a beautiful Saturday afternoon. Lea and Mad Dog enjoying the view:
This last weekend I took a trip to Chicago with a group of law school buddies for Jason's bachelor party. I don't have many pictures, but we did take a few from the bar on top of the Hancock Building, 95 stories up. That's the Sears Tower off in the distance.

The view was incredible. You can see clear off into Indiana and, at night, the lights off in Michigan City.

This is the crew. Pretty funny trip. Jason's a big time Twins fan, so he and three other guys went to the doubleheader on Friday, where the Twins shallacked the White Sox 20-14 and 12-0 respectively. The other four of us came up later Friday and hit the Saturday game with him. In a nutshell, we hit a club or two, had some gentlemen's disagreements with a bouncer or two, the occasional pop, and a dog at the Wiener's Circle at 4 a.m. Now that place is nuts. They made a pretty good dog, but the novelty of the place is that when you place your order, the clerks start shouting obscenities at you. Not my gig exactly, but it's a Chicago staple.

Anyway, that's the skinny. Chicago kicked. Batman Returns was also being filmed across the street from our hotel too. Looking to take the Mrs. down there later this summer.

All Star game just ended. Frickin' National League. That's embarrassing. Shoulda had more Dodgers in there.

2007-07-02T15:50:00.000-05:00

A former Muslim extremist explains why blaming terrorism on Western foreign policy only serves to strengthen the fundamentalist cause.

From the UK's Daily Mail:

For decades, radicals have been exploiting the tensions between Islamic theology and the modern secular state - typically by starting debate with the question: "Are you British or Muslim?"

But the main reason why radicals have managed to increase their following is because most Muslim institutions in Britain just don't want to talk about theology.

They refuse to broach the difficult and often complex truth that Islam can be interpreted as condoning violence against the unbeliever - and instead repeat the mantra that Islam is peace and hope that all of this debate will go away.

This has left the territory open for radicals to claim as their own. I should know because, as a former extremist recruiter, I repeatedly came across those who had tried to raise these issues with mosque authorities only to be banned from their grounds.

2007-07-02T15:44:00.000-05:00

Zimbabwean Archbishop Pius Ncube calls upon Great Britain to invade Zimbabwe.

Story in the Times:

Ncube said that far from helping those struggling on less than £1 a week, Mugabe had just spent £1m on surveillance equipment to monitor phone calls and e-mails. “How can you expect people to rise up when even our church services are attended by state intelligence people?

“People in our mission hospitals are dying of malnutrition. We had the best education in Africa and now our schools are closing. Most people are earning less than their bus fares. There’s no water or power. Is the world just going to let everything collapse in on us?”

2007-07-02T10:51:00.000-05:00

Rented the original Transformers movie over the weekend. It was a lot more exciting and believable when I was six. Couple things worth noting.

First, there is at least one S bomb in this movie. It has a PG rating, but Spike distinctly states at one point in the movie, "Oh s**t, what are we going to do now?" Couldn't believe it. And this was back in 1986 when PG movies had no profanity whatsoever.

Also, the rumor that the song "The Touch" is the same one that appears in the movie "Boogie Nights" is true.

Why you shouldn't be surprised, pt. 3.

2007-06-29T16:46:00.000-05:00

Remember the Palestinian Mickey Mouse ripoff that Hamas created to incite children to aspire to kill Jews when they grow up? Well, they finally ended the program...with Farfour being beaten to death by an Israeli trying to steal his land:

In the final skit, Farfour was beaten to death by an actor posing as an Israeli official trying to buy Farfour's land. At one point, Farfour called the Israeli a "terrorist."

"Farfour was martyred while defending his land," said Sara, the teen presenter. He was killed "by the killers of children," she added.

This was a tasteless show with an even more tasteless ending that demonstrates once again the hatred underlying Hamas' cause, but it's still better than playing "Don't Stop Believing" and then cutting to black for ten seconds.

Transformers

2007-06-28T08:55:00.000-05:00

I'm pumped over this movie. Every afternoon after kindergarten back in 1986, I would watch Transformers with my best friend Scott in Helena, Montana, after which we would take apart his parents' living room and build forts. It's about the best way a six-year-old can spend his day.

Scott and I were also two of apparently about a dozen or so people who went out and saw the Transformers cartoon movie that came out in 1986. I haven't seen it for over twenty years, but the memory that sticks out the most is that the producers killed off Optimus Prime (the audacity) and replaced him with some bot called Hot Rod who had just made his debut in the movie. What utter crap. No wonder it only made $6 million.

Anyway, I was tinkering around over at IMDB recently and discovered that for a mid-1980s Japanese cartoon that made only six bills, this movie had quite the cast:

Eric Idle

Casey Kasem

Judd Nelson

Leonard Nimoy

Robert Stack

Orson Freakin' Welles

I can see Dr. Spock being in it. He'll do anything from Priceline commercials to directing Holy Matrimony. But the Unsolved Mysteries guy? And Citizen Kane? How did they rope Orson Welles, one of the most prolific actors and directors ever into something designed to entertain a kindergartener? Sure enough, he did it. Transformers was his last movie before his death in 1985 (prior to its premiere).

May have to go rent it somewhere...

UPDATE: CNN article on Orson Welles' involvement in the 1986 Transformers.

Sad state of affairs

2007-06-28T07:53:00.000-05:00

Half of the stories on the customized "Montana News" tab on my Google News page is crap about Hannah Montana.

2007-06-27T11:57:00.000-05:00

And as for the list of things Mad Dog is frightened of (since I'm apparently into lists this week), add fire hydrants. Ours is the only dog on the planet who will not go near a fire hydrant.

2007-06-27T11:12:00.000-05:00

If you've been reading the news the last couple months, you might have noticed a growing number of goods that the People's Republic of China is unable to produce without, you know, covering them with poison or making them generally lethal. The list now includes:

It's no wonder they buy all their military crap from Russia.

2007-06-19T21:33:00.000-05:00

This is Mad Dog. She is afraid of:

cars
horses
bikes
vacuums (only when they're off)
other dogs (all sizes)
strollers
stairs (formerly)
pigeons
baby pigeons
my cell phone
old ladies with walkers

2007-06-18T18:07:00.000-05:00

Hamas receives Nobel Peace Prize.

...in a roundabout sort of way.

2007-06-15T16:46:00.000-05:00

I suspect that the people who throw out a dozen or so inane objections to every single request for production in a set are the same people who ran topicality every round in high school.

2007-06-15T16:03:00.000-05:00

Police in Italy finally captured a Russian ninja that has been breaking into North Italy farms. From the Beeb:

But on Monday night the "ninja" was outwitted.

As he smashed through the door of a farmhouse, a feisty old pensioner was waiting for him.

The old man came down the stairs but tripped on the last step letting off his rifle.

Startled, the "ninja" made his escape, hopping onto a bicycle and racing off into the nearby cornfields - followed by police who were quickly on the scene.

You'd expect that the farmer would look away for half a second instinctively in response to a noise and that the ninja would just kind of disappear, leaving the farmer searching about in amazement as the ninja quietly crawls across the ceiling to the window. But jumping onto the old guy's Huffy and riding off into the darkness? Not very ninja-esque.

The Mets get theirs.

2007-06-14T07:52:00.000-05:00

Dig it.

2007-06-14T07:51:00.000-05:00

NFL allows coaches to dress like coaches.

2007-06-13T08:20:00.000-05:00

If you're a young pitcher for the New York Mets, having three batters crack back-to-back-to-back home runs constitutes a bad day. Having one of those batters be opposing pitcher Hong-Chih Kuo makes it a frickin' horrible day.

Dodgers double up on the Mets with a 4-1 victory and pull back into a three-way tie for first place in the NL West.

2007-06-11T07:30:00.000-05:00

Pentagon confirms it recently paid $7.5 million to develop a "gay bomb." From CBS5 in San Francisco:

"The Ohio Air Force lab proposed that a bomb be developed that contained a chemical that would cause enemy soliders to become gay, and to have their units break down because all their soldiers became irresistably attractive to one another," Hammond said after reviewing the documents.

"The notion was that a chemical that would probably be pleasant in the human body in low quantities could be identified, and by virtue of either breathing or having their skin exposed to this chemical, the notion was that soliders would become gay," explained Hammond.

Story here.

His Holiness Prince Philip?

2007-06-10T14:34:00.000-05:00

Apparently there's a tribe in the South Pacific that literally believes that Prince Philip, the Duke of Edinburgh and husband of Queen Elizabeth II, is a god. No exaggeration. Nick Squires of the BBC has the story here. See also Richard Shears's article in the Daily Mail here.

2007-06-08T17:00:00.001-05:00

The City of Los Angeles will sleep more comfortably tonight knowing that Paris Hilton is back off the streets and in police custody.

Animal.

Guy tries to jump the Pope.

2007-06-06T08:19:00.000-05:00

Earlier today in Rome some tried hopping a rail during a general audience and hitching a ride on the Popemobile. A bunch of suits immediately dragged him to the ground and the Pope appeared none the wiser. I couldn't help noticing, though, the Swiss Guard just standing there in the midst of the fracas. There's video at cnn.com and I'll post a youtube link once it's up, but take a look. Is it just me or did that Swiss guard go into total spectator mode?

I can't say I blame him. They dress the guy in tights and arm him with a butter knife. Can't say I'd do much differently under the circumstances.

2007-06-06T08:06:00.000-05:00

"Are you gellin'?"

Putin threatens new arms race with US.

2007-06-06T08:00:00.000-05:00

Yeah, because that worked out really well for you guys last time around.

Best of luck.

Time for a new debate format.

2007-06-05T20:37:00.000-05:00

I caught the final few minutes of the Republican presidential debate on CNN after getting home from work tonight. It occurred to me that television has been using the same debate format ever since Kennedy debated Nixon back in 1960: questions from a panel with one-to-two minute answers, and in the case of a small number of candidates, a rebuttal. The original incarnation of the American electoral debate was the Lincoln-Douglas debates in the 1858 Illinois Senate race a century and a half ago. Lincoln and Douglas would argue the morality of slavery for hours at a time in each of Illinois' congressional districts.

Obviously letting ten candidates go at it without time limits or moderators directing the debate isn't feasible today. But one minute responses to questions about complex issues like terrorism, immigration, or the economy? A candidate can't possibly express his own ideas or critique those of his adversary in such short time. This isn't to say that candidates won't try--but in doing so, they often have to oversimplify their ideas and, as is increasingly the case, dumb down the ideas themselves.

So here's what I'd suggest. First of all, completely ditch these ten candidate early debates. They're completely unnecessary. Don't even start thinking about it for another six months or so when half of these candidates are gone.

Second, at that point, cut the number of questions and increase the amount of time candidates are given to discuss their ideas. Give them eight minutes apiece per question. And if there are only two or three candidates in the mix, throw in some three or four minute rebuttals. That way candidates won't be saved by the bell. Make Mitt Romney explain what he would do about immigration instead of simply taking a minute to declare his opposition to "amnesty." Any former debaters reading this might have an idea where eight minutes and three minutes come from. But think about it--would debate have been a worthwhile activity if it was a string of pithy one minute back-and-forth retorts? Of course not. People want substance from their candidates and the only way they're going to get it is if candidates have adequate time. We don't need twelve questions on immigration or terrorism; you get the same canned response each time anyway. I'd rather have one in-depth response than seven or eight abbreviated ones.

Third, let candidates pose questions to one another. Give them some control over the direction of the debate rather than leaving it in the hands of Brit Hume and Wolf Blitzer. It is, after all, their campaign. They should have at least some control over the message.

Thanks for the memories, Cindy...

2007-05-30T11:57:00.000-05:00

The Daily Kos reported the sad news yesterday that comic legend Cindy Sheehan is retiring as the face of the anti-war movement. Some of my favorite moments:

President Bush flies the entire Sheehan family to Washington state in order to express his condolences for the death of Casey Sheehan in person. She tells the Vacaville Reporter, "I now know he's sincere about wanting freedom for the Iraqis...I know he's sorry and feels some pain for our loss. And I know he's a man of faith."

Her camping trip to a ditch outside Bush's Crawford ranch to demand a meeting that she'd already had once.
When Bush sends in the National Guard to help victims of Hurricane Katrina, Cindy calls for Bush to "pull our troops out of occupied New Orleans."
And who could forget her passionate smooch with dissent-crushing Hugo Chavez? (Yeah, that's her.)

Anyway, Cindy, you started an anti-war movement fore the sole purpose of shoving your face in the lime light, while driving away your family and spitting upon everything your son fought for at the same time--in his name no less. Maybe it's not such a bad idea to go home, relax a bit, and put your damned head on straight. As many problems as this nation might have (and they are plenty), the problem here is not America failing to "figure it out." It's you.

Good riddance.

2007-05-29T06:30:00.000-05:00

"A people who take no pride in the noble achievements of remote ancestors, will never achieve anything worthy to be remembered with pride by remote generations."
--Lord Thomas B. Macaulay

Happy Memorial Day.

As I mentioned once before on this blog, both sides of my family come from Montana and have been there for a number of generations. I found out back in September that the Clark side of the family came to Montana from Red Wing, Minnesota. This being Memorial Day and all, it might not be a bad idea to tell a bit more of that story.

Yesterday I went down to Red Wing to find the grave of William W. Clark. I was able to get ahold of the name of the cemetery as well as lot and block number...and since I don't really have much in the way of passed relatives out here, figured it might be a good idea.

I don't know much about W.W. Clark, but here's what I do know. He was one of the first to settle the Red Wing area back in the 1850s. He studied law at the newly founded Hamline University (which at that time was in Red Wing), got married, had a child, and soon became a clerk of court in Goodhue County.

Then Fort Sumter was attacked. Minnesota's governor was in Washington at the time and immediately wired home his call to arms. The "Goodhue Volunteers" thus became one of the first Civil War units organized outside of the standing military. William Clark was among them. He and the rest of the company kissed their families goodbye and headed north to Fort Snelling. It was there that he would contract typhoid fever die at the age of 29.

Which I guess is the reason for this post. Memorial Day wasn't created for barbeques, RV trips and Formula 1. It's a single day we set aside to pay respects to men and women who have served the United States. And while I don't claim to have been laying flowers at the cemetery every Memorial Day myself, after this weekend, I plan on starting.

An oldie but a goodie...

2007-05-21T14:23:00.000-05:00

Hugo Chavez tries to replicate Robert Mugabe's success.

2007-05-18T08:40:00.000-05:00

From the New York Times:

Mr. Chávez is carrying out what may become the largest forced land redistribution in Venezuela’s history, building utopian farming villages for squatters, lavishing money on new cooperatives and sending army commando units to supervise seized estates in six states.

The violence has gone both ways in the struggle, with more than 160 peasants killed by hired gunmen in Venezuela, including several here in northwestern Yaracuy State, an epicenter of the land reform project, in recent years. Eight landowners have also been killed here.

“The oligarchy is always on the attack and trying to say you are no good,” Mr. Chávez said to squatters in a televised visit here. “They think they’re the owners of the world.”

Ironically, Mugabe's Zimbabwe has now achieved 3,700% inflation due to food shortages--shortages caused by Mugabe's land seizure program.

2007-05-17T08:13:00.000-05:00

"unity government"

Jerry Falwell, 1933-2007

2007-05-15T13:50:00.000-05:00

I have never been a fan of Jerry Falwell. The man advocated segregation, actively supported Apartheid in South Africa, blamed gays and lesbians for 9/11, claimed that AIDS was God's punishment for gays, and suggested that a Teletubby was gay, (you might notice a trend there)yet still maintained a following in this country.

Yet, as sad and despicable as I find this false Christian's life, I find it almost as sad that Anna Nicole Smith's death will carry with it more headlines.

24 LiveBlogging 3:00 a.m. to 4:00 a.m.

2007-05-14T21:00:00.000-05:00

Gonna give the liveblogging a go here.

Morris puts his jacket over Milo's face. Too bad. I think he really liked that jacket. He was wearing it last season too.

Ya know, I might be the only one, but I think that Mike Doyle is Josh’s father. Look at the two of them. They even have the same damn haircut.

Morris chokin’ some Chinese dude?

Jack: “Nadia, you did great…Except for the part where you let Milo get shot. But other than that, bang up job. Gold star.”

Jack knows the schematics of this building better than anyone. What he was doing studying the sewer system below CTU I have no idea.

Commercial

Elisha Cuthbert: Abduction. Confinement. Torture. Termination. Cougars. Coming June 22.

3:13… Papa Bauer: “As such a great patriot, I’m taking you away from this ungrateful country…to a communist one. And don’t worry. You won’t stick out at all.”

Mike Doyle never let’s a helmet mess up that sweet do no matter how many people are shooting at his head.

3:17: Josh in Jack’s arms: “Wanna have a catch….Dad?”

3:27: Holy crap….How long have Lisa Miller and the mole been going at it? At least she has an excuse to go freshen up now.

3:35:

Commercial

Did I just see Dane Cook in a preview for a serious movie? I don’t think I care for that.

Ugh, I will never buy a MacIntosh because of these commercials. Reeks of pretense.

3:41: “I’m here to investigate the security breach. Does something smell like sewer?”

Miles: “Um, Nadia…Any chance I could get CTU to cover the dry cleaning on that sport jacket? Promise I’ll get a receipt.”

The plot line with the Russians makes zero sense. Even if this little tiny component were somehow the key to Russian defense, why would the Russians further compromise their defense by starting a war with the biggest kid on the block? Then you’ve got all of your forces locked up with American forces in Europe and South Asia AND you’ve got your ass hanging out in the wind for the Chinese to do whatever. Of course Acting President Curly Bill Brocious tried making the same move vis-à-vis Unnamed Arab Country earlier in the day, so it’s also kind of ironic.

Why you still shouldn't be surprised...

2007-05-10T12:51:00.000-05:00

Hamas is airing a children's TV show in Palestine with a Mickey Mouse ripoff named Farfur who encourages children to "kill all the Jews." Don't believe me? Watch it here:

And here's a transcript. A brief sample:

Farfour, a Mickey Mouse character in a tuxedo: Sanabel, what should we do if we want to liberate...
Sanable: We want to fight.
Farfour: We got that. What else?
Saraa: We want to...
Sanabel: We will annihilate the Jews.
Saraa: We are defending Al-Aqsa with our souls and our blood, aren't we, Sanabel?
Sanabel: I will commit martyrdom.

THE CARNIVAL OF BAUER

2007-05-10T08:21:00.000-05:00

Another episode of the Carnival of Bauer starts now.

Recaps:

Dave at Morning Maniac Music tells us what he learned between 2 a.m. and 3 a.m.

Steve of the Magic Lamp gives a dissertation on Monday's episode. Couple lines in this post got an outloud chuckle: "Marilyn gets Josh to help her move a couch in front of the glass door, because using her powerful reasoning skills she can just tell that there would be no way that two grown men could figure out how to get around THAT."

The blogger who takes the nom de guerre of Rickey Henderson wonders, as do a lot of us, if 24's writers will ever come up with a season that doesn't involve a CTU breach. And he also talks in the third person. Kinda wild. (George is gettin' upset!)

Amy at Remote Access admits she's actually kind of glad that Milo bought the farm. She and Rickey both figured that the Chinese were after Chloe. Personally, I thought they might be going for Morris--give him a chance at redemption. But using the same ploy twice in one season would be a bit much even for Surnow et al.

Fellow Minneapolis blogger Jeff Kouba posted his recap at Truth vs. the Machine with a number of poignant observations--like the fact that CTU can apparently be penetrated Helm's Deep style through a grate in the sewer system. "And never mind the security, didn’t anyone, uh, ever catch a whiff of bowel?"

Paul at Lifelike Pundits touches on a few of the many reasons why this season has left many a 24 fan a bit dissatisfied--in particular, the early resolution to the loose nukes and the dramatic drift of some of the stock CTU characters.

As always, the Jack Sack has a few words to say about the most recent episode:

Ol' Philly is up to no good again, trying to kill many good people and help the Chinese start World War Three, while kidnapping his extremely whiny grandson. I have a hard time figuring out why Gradpappy Bauer would want to drag that kid around. Did Phil stuff the kid with diamonds like a Colombian mule? Does Josh have an ability to open locks, control the weather and manipulate space-time, etc.?

Blogs4Bauer is 24 central:

Kill Counter Challenge - Week 17

LiveBlogging by bRight&Early

TivoBlogging by V the K

And let's not forget that yesterday was Jack Bauer Appreciation Day.

Anyway, thanks to the kind folks at Blogs4Bauer for allowing me to host the Carnival this week.

2007-05-09T08:21:00.000-05:00

Lea, you thought it was Nurse's Appreciation Day? Sorry, but you'll have to scoot over:

Details at the Jack Sack.

2007-05-09T08:03:00.000-05:00

Extreme Makeover Home Edition's Ty Pennington after his drunk driving arrest: “I could have jeopardised the lives of others and I am grateful there was no accident or harm done to anyone. This was my wake-up call. I also want to apologise to my fans, ABC Television and my design team for my lapse in judgment and the embarrassment I have caused.”

Paris Hilton after her drunk driving arrest and three citations for driving without a license: It was my publicist's fault and I should get a gubernatorial pardon.

Okay, that aside, there is a touch of humor in the Ty Pennington DUI. I couldn't help being reminded of Nick Nolte's DUI arrest a couple years ago and his subsequent mugshot, hair askew in every which way:

Or James Brown's:

Or Tom DeLay's:

Funny thing is Ty Pennington does his hair like that on purpose. He's virtually embarrassing-mug-shot-proof. For all I know, this could very well be his mug:

LOVE 105?

2007-05-08T10:22:00.000-05:00

I listen to only three stations in the Twin Cities: Minnesota Public Radio, Drive 105 and the Current. Drive 105 and the Current are the only stations that play solid indie rock: Snow Patrol, Modest Mouse, TV on the Radio, the like. Well, Drive 105 is now dead. They killed it and put in its place "Love" 105. Another '60s-to-'80s R&B/soft rock station. I want to vomit.

2007-05-04T13:14:00.000-05:00

There might be nothing finer to listen to at work than Philip Glass. "Metamorphosis Two" is my new favorite song. You really have to listen to the entire thing to get the full effect.

2007-05-04T07:40:00.000-05:00

Next Thursday, Tommy Lawyer will host Blogs4Bauer's weekly CARNIVAL OF BAUER. I don't have a lot of time to explain what that that means right now. You're going to have to trust me because we are operating on a strict need-to-know basis.

Are we clear??

This week's carnival is over at Truth vs. the Machine.

2007-05-01T09:07:00.000-05:00

I'm trying this cream and sugar stuff in my coffee this morning. Supposed to be wild.

UPDATE:

I'm never doing that again.

2007-04-29T12:46:00.000-05:00

We apparently have a new roommate in our apartment.

As the temps warmed up here in Minneapolis, pigeons started making our balcony their new hangout. And as if that isn't bad enough, they're crapping all over the damn place. Our guard dog is no good at keeping them away. Shoot, we have a tough enough time trying to keep her from licking the crap off the concrete.

So I've managed to flush most of them out, but there's one that will fly to the balcony next door whenever I open the door and then come back the second I go inside. Well, now we know why. The damn thing laid a couple eggs in our empty pot.

I'm not exactly thrilled about it--this thing moved into my habitat and just decides it's going to make its home there? 'Fraid not. But Lea's determined to let nature take its course, so I may have to live with thing for awhile. Thing better learn how to use the puppy pad like the Mad Dog though or else I may be having eggs for breakfast next Sunday.

Out come the wolves...

2007-04-28T10:04:00.000-05:00

In a stunning demonstration of compassion, the Church of Scientology descends upon Virginia Tech to offer hugs and free personality tests.

2007-04-26T16:02:00.000-05:00

A friend showed this to me and it's too damn funny not to be shared:

Japanese Conned Into Buying Sheep As Poodles

Someone imported a bunch of sheep from Britain and Australia and sold them off to the Japanese as poodles. And this is my favorite part:

One couple found out the truth only after a dog groomer told them she could not trim their poodle's claws because they were hooves.

And speaking of cajones...

2007-04-18T10:58:00.000-05:00

These guys are hanging by a threat off of the Wells Fargo Building across the street, probably about 27 storeys up--no platform, no bucket. They're just hanging there in a harness, cleaning windows.

2007-04-18T08:02:00.000-05:00

Well, he's got the greed part right. The cajones on this guy...

2007-04-16T08:11:00.000-05:00

Don't pretend that you haven't noticed the similiarity.

More fun with double standards.

2007-04-10T08:20:00.000-05:00

Don Imus is an idiot. He thinks so. We all think so. So let's get that out of the way.

In the wake of the "nappyheaded hos" comment are Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson leading the public relations charge to have the man fired. What peeves me is that these two black leaders are very selective about what offends them. When Don Imus makes a comment like he does, he should be fired. When Michael Richards goes on a tirade, he should be...I don't know, crucified. Whatever. I'm inclined to agree. But what about 50 cent? Or Jay Z? Al Sharpton has stated many times before that he doesn't particularly care for their use of the "n word" either, but the only time you hear him say so is when he's specifically asked about the double standard. There are no marches. There are no press conferences. Hell, there aren't even any press releases. If racial slurs like these are offensive to you, then it shouldn't only offend you when Don Imus or Michael Richards say it. Matter of fact, it should be more offensive when someone of your own race tosses the word around so flippantly.

What really gets me though is a comparison of Al Sharpton's reaction to Don Imus's comments and his reaction to Ralph Nader's racial slur from two years ago. Yeah--Nader. In all likelihood, you never even heard about it because the New York Daily News was practically the only paper that ran the story (the link to the original story is gone). Nader was commenting on campaigning in Georgia:

Speaking Wednesday night at a Washington fund-raiser to retire the debt from his 2004 presidential campaign, Nader complained that Democratic Party powerbrokers had kept him off the ballot in such Southern states as Georgia and Virginia - which reminded him of the oppressive Jim Crow laws that denied African-Americans equal rights.

"I felt like a [n-word]," remarked the 70-year-old white multimillionaire graduate of Princeton University and Harvard Law School.

Not so much as a whimper from the black community. No marches. No protests. Al Sharpton basically just told Nader to refrain from use of the word in the future. From Sharpton:

"If Ed Koch had said what Ralph Nader said, we'd be marching," Sharpton noted. "This [scolding] doesn't rise to the level of a march. It rises to the level of a wrist slap."

Oh, okay. If Ed Koch said it, then it would be offensive. If it's your buddy Ralph, then no one need care.

Here's what this comes down to. I have no doubt that the n-word is offensive. I truly wish it were stricken from our vocabulary. But when I see Don Imus get the third degree and Ralph Nader get a Get-Out-of-Jail-Free card, I conclude that the big huzzah is grounded less in changing behaviors and more political tactic. You can't just get mad about it when it's people that are your political enemies. Otherwise, the rest of us have no reason to take your anger seriously and the whole thing is self-defeating.

2007-04-05T09:40:00.000-05:00

As long as Nancy Pelosi is doing her shuttle diplomacy thing over in Syria, I wonder if she could maybe get us a concrete answer as to whether al-Assad is ever going to grow in that mustache. It's always just kinda there.

2007-04-05T08:21:00.000-05:00

Some of my 3L friends are realizing just how much of a racket BarBri prep courses are: $2,500+ to review things you already learned in three years of law school. They should start a sitcom with a plot similar to Knights of Prosperity, only instead of the show being about a group of blue collars down on their luck who put together a plan to rob Mick Jagger, it would be about a group of white collar law students who decide to rob F. Lee Bailey so they can pay for bar prep. Call it Knights of Contractual Privity or something.